a little laugh :-)

[MageNathaniel1]

the usual annoying karaoke singer at the pub say he went to the bank with his violin case and everyone in the bank looked afraid like he might be a robber. chauncy said more likely they were afraid you might play it.

[MageNathaniel1]

chauncy comes home from the track, his wife asks him how he did. he says put it this way, a horse I bet on for the 1st race was so slow, he came in last in the 3rd race.

[MageNathaniel1]

chauncy's wife says that is the last time we watch a nature program while my mother is here. chauncy says why? just because when they talked about how much a whale weighs, I asked your mum about her diet? his wife said it was how you asked, with the reference to the whale's weight compared to hers.

[MageNathaniel1]

chauncy's wife said I learned all my recipies from my mum and she from her mum, perhaps I should write a book and sell it with all the recipies passed down to me. chauncy says I have the perfect title, 1001 ways to poison someone with food.

[MageNathaniel1]

chauncy is at the bank and asks if he can open an account with only 1 pound, the teller says yes. he then asks if the account includes overdraft protection  again yes. but he was thrown out when he tried to use an IOU for the 1 pound to open the account.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncey is at the bank, the manager tells him it is no longer needed to go into a bank to apply for a loan, he can do it online. Chauncey replied, I tried that once, I did not know a computer could laugh at you until then.

[MageNathaniel1]

Sean and chauncy are in the pub. The keep says I just need to pop into the cellar fir a mkment will be right back. He no sooner gets past the stairs and realizes the mistake he just made as he hears chauncy behind the bar and finds the cellar door locked.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy teels the keep that his wife had come home saying she had tried a bew hair salon and wanted to know what he thought. when he told her she looked like a poodle that had been hit by ligjtning, she told him to eat at the pub tonight.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy asks his wife to get a cup of tea for him. She yells I am still cleaning the oven. He says oh, I forgot well, mind your head when you stand up to make the tea.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy is banging on the door yelling for his wife to open the door. Sean says to him you are still in the pub and that is the closet door.

[MageNathaniel1]

The bloke next to chauncy in the oub says I can see yiu are not afraid to grab an opportunity when you see it. Chauncy says what makes you say that. He replies that us my pint you grabbed while my back was turned.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy's mother in law arrives to drop off a recipie for his wife. Chauncy tells his wife your mum is here with the formula for her latest failed food experiment.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy sees a flyer for a job posting with ideal wages and hours for whuch he met the qualifications. He decided to hide the flyer before his wife saw it so he would not have to apply.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy tells the keep there is nothing so rare and elegant as a fresh poured pint of ale. The keep says I know of one thing. Chauncy says what might that be? The keep says the sight of you actually paying your tab.

[MageNathaniel1]

Chauncy recently had a minor unfortunate accident. Seems when he went to the pub, he forgot his house key. When he got home, he had to knock on the door  but his wife did not seem to hear him so, he pushed open the mail flap in the door to yell for her. As he yelled her name, the flap snapped shut on his tongue. Just as he got it out, his wife opened the door hitting him in the head with it. This made it dufficult for him to order a pint at tge pub as his tongue was still swollen the next night.