In Dedication to the bear and her upcoming trip to Hawaii and nuptuals

[Amore / Daniella]

Forgive Me, Father

 Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation. They were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy. As soon as the plane landed, they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc.
 
 The next morning, they went to the beach, dressed in their "tourist"garb. They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the
sunshine and the scenery when a "drop dead gorgeous" topless blond in a thong bikini came walking straight towards them. They couldn't help but stare. As the blond passed them, she smiled and said, "Good morning, Father. Good morning, Father," nodding and addressing each of them.
 
 They were both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests? So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous outfits. These were so loud you could hear them before you even saw them.
 
 Once again, the two priests (incognito) settled on the beach, in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine.
 
 After a while, the same gorgeous topless blond, wearing a string, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them. Again she nodded at each of them, and said, "Good morning, Father," and started to walk away.
 
 One of the priests couldn't stand it any longer and said, "Just a minute young lady."

"Yes?," she replied.
 
 "We are priests, and proud of it, but I have to know, how in the world did you know we are priests, dressed as we are?"
 
 "Father, it's me, Sister Mary Francis," she replied.


                 


To:            IT Organization
 Subject:   Girlfriend to Wife transition


 QUESTION:

 Dear Tech Support:

 Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed  that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system
 activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6.

 I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to
 Girlfriend7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

 Thanks,
 A Troubled User
 ______________________________________

 REPLY:

 Dear Troubled User:

 This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a
 Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

 You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background
 application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

 The best course of action! is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will h ave to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

 Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.

 Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

 However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1, Hugs 4.3 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

 Best of luck,
 Tech Support

 

[RAGNAR]

LMTAO

[Ayelen]

BOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


~starts initiating new program upgrades~

~hits a zip file....  Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3~  Wait, wasn't that me like eons ago?  ~yep, definitely erases that file~

hehe

Got the plane tickets and my friend's step mom who owns a condo in Kuiai is putting us up for one night freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee .................. as our wedding gift.

WoohoOOOOoOOOOOoooO!