this may get a lil sappy, but bear with me.....I had an interesting talk with my son tonight...and wanted to share it....
we had a great easter dinner at my in'laws and came home, and just chilled out watching television.....and we happened on the show great makeovers, home edition.....the recipients were a family in mississippi who had done a great deal for their community during the hurricane, and had never spoken about their own horrid living conditions, and this woman just kept giving and giving, no matter the hardships to her own family.....so the show built her a house, gave her a car, and redid her in home business....a new life so to speak.....from beyond dire straights, to full scholarships for her children, and a brand new start.....
now comes the conversation with my son......he says, mum! wouldnt that be cool if that happened to us??? he was so excited.....mum! all that new stuff and a new car! and they all get to go to college! how cool is that!......and I had to sit there, and calmly explain a few things to his almost nine year old personality......that there are two things to do when you are confronted with a situation like that......one....is be happy for the receiving family and move on.......two....give back what we have, or give time to our own community.....and he gets confused....and says you mean you wouldnt want those things?.....and I shook my head, and said, no hon, I wouldnt and do you want to know why? and he says YEAH! youre crazy if you dont want that stuff!......so I begin.....well, we are different from them peanut, very different.....and he comes back with but you told me I wasnt any different than anybody else and that we all have to be treated equal......and I simply said....EXACTLY.....those people did not even have running water or plumbing that worked, they had 4 people in a house/business with no room for themselves, having to bring in water from outside, help everyone in their community, get to school, deal with the embarrasment of their surroundings......now peanut.....do you have a nice house.....yes...., do you take a shower every other day.....yes.....you have 5 vehicles, a basketball hoop, a comfortable bedroom you dont have to share, a bike, a computer, a playstation, a psp, new cleats every sport season, you PLAY the expensive sports every season, you have the clothes you want, you listen to the music you want on your ipod, you get to go jeeping all the time, you get to have friends over all the time and have a blast with them, you mum and your step dad are building a brand NEW house, with our OWN money, and giving you three boys the entire upstairs all to yourselves.....your older stepbrother already has a muscle car to work on till he gets his lisence.....Jamie and I will help you and Tim get your own as well when the time comes......you have fabulous meals every day surrounded by your family when we all talk about our day and what we want to do over the next couple weeks, months, even just next weekend......you ask for something for your birthday, we find a way to get it, you ask for something for christmas, we find a way to get it........now peanut.........what side do you think your on?........the needing side, or the need to GIVE side? (emphasize dramatic pause here)
he thinks on it, looks at me, and just gives me a great big huge hug.........thanks for workin so hard for me mum, I really appreciate it, you're the best mum in the world........((insert Gretchen melting into a slobby pile of feel good goo here))
mum! we need to help people!...........well peanut, how can we do that? well, if my friends dont have as much as I do, I invite them over to OUR house where there is a ton of fun things to do, and if I have a toy I dont really need, I can let them borrow it, or they can ride my bike or they can borrow my paint ball gun or we can ask them to come play baseball at our house cause we have enough room, yeah! I see it! we're on the GIVING side cause we already HAVE all that kind of stuff..........
the light dawns over selfish head *chuckles*........he worked through it, and came out on top........and I am so damn proud.....
yes peanut, we ARE on the giving side, we have a fabulous life, fabulous people, fabulous things, and an appreciation for all of it..........we need to share it.......not keep it to ourselves......because there are a lot of people out there that need our help, even something as simple as a smile........it doesnt take much.....to give a little more.
so I'm going to try and rope this in on our boys, cause the middle one already really gets it, he's a great kid with the heart of a lion......lil peanut turning 9 in a week is still in the the one with the most toys wins ((I dont help by pretty much giving him what he wants on holidays within reason)).......but I think after tonight, and that show, he realizes that not everyone has it as easy as we do........and he has NO idea what it took to get here.....I'll tell him someday.....when he can handle it......
so in closing, if you see a gentler more generous Kar, there is nothing behind it except genuine wanting to help, because if my boys see ME doing good things, they will follow suit, sooner or later, sooner would be better LOL
the selfish lil 20 something bitch that was here a while ago, has certainly changed with motherhood, and smoothed right into the typical super involved mum with five million activities and responsibilities, and is so fulfilled with every damn minute of it.....
the simple life, *aaaaaaaaaaah*, was once boring for me, now.........its what I cherish and thrive in.....
to everyone's betterment it seems, because I have found, as my son has found through our conversation this evening........that it is quite easy......
TO GIVE A LITTLE MORE
